Continuing with the theme of Holy Baptism some consideration needs to be addressed regarding some pastoral aspects of this sacramental rite. It’s my guess that very little thought is given to baptism by most laity except for their desire as parents to have their children baptized. More thought is surely given by adults who desire to be baptized and hopefully, in these cases, more time and effort is expended by all parties concerning the decision to be baptized. For a background on the issue of adult baptism I strongly suggest that you read my post New Baptismal Theology? Adult Baptism. However, for a priest sometimes the decision to baptize is not so cut and dry, especially in light of pastoral concerns and issues.
This is not the place to delineate a comprehensive statement of the theology of baptism itself. Let it suffice it to say that all Christians affirm baptism whether as a child or as an adult. And although distinctions may be drawn, and frankly should be drawn, between baptism as essential to the Christian life or fundamental to Christian belief, baptism is universally accepted as important to all Christian groups. This being said, distinctions between baptized and non-baptized persons are made in the Episcopal Church. For instance baptism is required for persons to receive the Eucharistic elements. In the Burial of the Dead a distinction is made regarding “Baptized Christians are properly buried from the church” and in some places the burial of the body is not permitted in church cemeteries. Also, in our marriage rites at least one of the parties must be baptized for the priest to be able to perform the ceremony. The role of baptism in the burial rite, although not explicitly laid out, was also addressed in the 1928 Book of Common Prayer where, in the Burial Rite a rubric reads: “It is to be noted that this Office is appropriate to be used only for the faithful departed in Christ, provided that in any other case the Minister may, at his discretion, use such part of this Office, or such devotions taken from other parts of this Book, as may be fitting.” [Emphasis added]
Regretfully things are not always so simple or straight forward for priests under extraordinary pastoral circumstances. And let me say up front that my decisions were made on the basis of what I understand to be the theology of baptism as practiced by the Episcopal Church and its application to concrete pastoral situations. Some readers will follow and accept my reasoning while others will vehemently disagree with the stance I took. Either way, it is my hope that what I have to share will foster further discussion and understanding as to the role baptism plays in our theological, sacramental, liturgical and pastoral lives together.
Over the course of 35 years as a priest I have been asked to perform baptisms numerous times during my hospital ministries as either a chaplain of the institutions or as a priest visiting parishioners. A couple of times I have been confronted with whether or not I should, or theologically and liturgically could, perform the Sacrament of Holy Baptism.
Several years ago, while at the bedside of a non-responsive 83 year old man, his wife asked me to baptize him. At the time her husband was in critical condition and was not expected to live. This couple had, for more than 25 years, been very active in the life and ministries of their parish. However, although her husband was one of several persons who could always be counted on in being present for every service, he had never been baptized. This fact came to me when I noticed that he never came forward to receive the Eucharistic elements even when he was serving as an usher for the service. Naturally, when an appropriate time and place presented itself, we took some time apart and I inquired as to his non-participation at the altar rail. He informed me that I was not the first priest (in fact several has preceded me) to ask him about this and he simply shared that he had not been baptized. Naturally I attempted to engage him about his decision and sought out various avenues in approaching the topic.
Over the next few years, from time to time, I continued to bring up this topic and each time he shared that he chose not to be baptized. Pastorally I am not able to share with you the nature of our discussions but it’s important for you to know that his refusal to be baptized had nothing to do with any personal sense of guilt or rejection or lack of understanding or broken relationships with family, friends, or the Church. Although I did not necessarily agree with his reasoning I did share with him that I would always continue to respect his decision and continued to encourage him to feel free to speak with me at any time regarding this issue. And so it went on for years.
Now I found myself being asked by his wife to have him baptized while on what she perceived was her husband’s deathbed. What should I do? Would it be theologically, sacra mentally, liturgically and pastorally appropriate for me to perform his baptism? Well, before the suspense gets to great, I turned the conversation to a series of various inquiries with his wife about what her husband had expressed throughout all those years. And we talked about the loving acceptance of our God and our Lord Jesus Christ. And we talked about the practical reality that no priest or minister actually does any baptism but rather it is Jesus Christ who is the Baptizer and that everyone’s salvation was made manifest when Jesus Christ died on his cross for our sins and for our redemption and for our salvation. I then said that, at this time, we could not be sure that her husband had come to the end of his life, and that we ought to respect his life long decision regarding baptism. Which we did.
Thankfully my friend and parishioner and fellow worker with Christ did not die and, after his discharge from the hospital, returned home to his wife and family.
Some time after his discharge from the hospital I was called to another parish. Years later I received word that this gentleman had died. To this day I do not know if he ever decided to be baptized. And I have been troubled about my decision to not baptize him. However, I feel confident that although I may have missed an opportunity to bring another soul into the church my conscience is comforted with the thought that I at least respected him and his adult decision to not be baptized. And to this day I truly believe that he was, and is, one of God’s children. Yes, an adult respected!
3 Responses to “Holy Baptism: An Adult Respected”
RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URI
You should not trouble your heart you did the right thing. Baptism is not something that can be forced or “snuck” upon someone. You knew his reasoning and you were bound to respect it. When once faced with a similar situation I consulted a wise Bishop who told me under no circumstance should I sneak a baptism in on someone but that since we are all God’s children God would handle it in his own way.
Hello Fellow Believers,
Please beg me to stand in defense of the Gospel here. Baptism is not only necessary, but essential to salvation.
Jesus knew in the temple at age 12 that he must be about His Father’s business. Now, we know Jesus had an infinite IQ, but the inference seems to be that at that age one probably begins to know what he should be about.
He who believes and is baptized shall be saved. Those who have been baptized into Christ have put on Christ. How else do you put on Christ. Acts 2:38 says, “Repent and be baptized in the Name of Jesus Christ FOR the remission or forgiveness of sins, and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost. Does that sound like it is an option, or just important for a believer?
Baptism is either essential to salvation, or it isn’t. You had better be right! Can you afford to be wrong???
I know that this is direct, but I didn’t see any other way of responding. Please let us reason together, and come to a complete knowledge of the truth before it is everlastingly too late.
Blessings to all,
Brother Paul
Dear Brother Paul,
I appreciate your response however I do not support all of your conclusions. I do agree that those who believe are are baptized into Christ are called to put on Christ. However, a distinction exists between the essential and what is necessary for salvation. These two are necessarily inclusive of each other. According to your reasoning, the actions by the Church of the Latter Day Saints are acceptable when they acquire lists of deceased Jews and have a service of baptism thus brings them into their belief system.
I feel the same is true of any clergyperson who would baptize an adult who is no longer able to express his or her desire to be baptized into the faith. No opportunity for repentance is possible.